I. Am. So. Done. =) It's officially time for the semester to be over and my brain to get some much needed breathing space. Although, I can't complain - I had a really easy finals week compared to a lot of people. I have one more final and then I'm home Wednesday night. Yesterday I spend twelve, yes, twelve, hours studying for my calculus final tonight. I got up, got ready, opened my book, and with the exception of a few brief breaks, that is what I did until 2 in the morning. And I just got done. :) The good news is, I feel pretty good about it. The bad news - that doesn't always mean much. Lol.
I'm now treating myself to a brain break before heading off to the chemistry study session. I'm probably not going to score as high on chemistry, but I'm not super worried. According to my friend Sarah, she's been talking to a bunch of 105 TAs, and they said that since over 1/2 the class is currently failing, the curve is going to be massive. Couple that with the fact that I got an email saying I'm in the top 25%.... well, I might actually pull out a solid B, or maaaybe an A. Time will tell...
Finals week is crazy. But I'll be home in approximately 29 hours! I finally started packing this morning. It's crazy how much stuff one might need for 3 weeks. And yes, I'm being a complete nerd and taking an online class over Christmas break. It's 3 credits, and a pre-requisite for my history major, so I figured, might as well.
Anyhow, there's not much new aside from the fact that I am now done with my first semester at WSU! I'm a happy person. :D
PS: Dear whoever left their half used, open shampoo bottle on the porch: That's just weird.
*The End, Matthew West
12.10.2010
"Got a couple rips in my jeans....try to put the pieces together, but perfection is my enemy..."
Let me just begin this post by saying, that no, I am not in a bad mood today. I have had a fabulous Friday, and the week overall has been pretty spectacular, too. :) I'm home in like... basically 5 days, and I only have two more tests to go. So this entry isn't some emotional spit-up of my stress. It's just the fact that I've been learning some things about what makes me irritated lately, and I think it's time for the blog-o-sphere to be privvy to them.
Apathy. Oh yes. I've known this one for a long time. But it's still good to refresh. I HATE apathy. I don't even care if you disagree with what I have to say, as long as you have your own opinion! People who drift by and go with the flow are so frustrating. I'm not saying like, people who are low-key or people who are flexible. That's totally different. I mean as far as your moral code goes. You DO or you DO NOT. But you can't say one thing to one person, and then something different to another. In high school, this was tricky, because everyone wants to be accepted. And really, high school is pretty judgemental. But the more I'm in college, the more I realize that people in the "real world" are mature enough to value individuality. You can agree to disagree, and you can have a mature, intelligent debate without tearing each other apart. But when you refuse to take a stand for anything, I'm sorry, but that just frustrates me. And you're really likely to rub me the wrong way.
Taking this a step farther ... I really really really don't like cursing. Duh. Anyone who's known me for more than a little while can attest that I have never said a curse word. I don't quote them when someone else says it, I don't write it down as a piece of dialogue. And I am so disheartened when people who should know better (aka: Christians) choose to do so. I know that everyone has struggles. I know that people have "grown up around it" and it's "normal" to them. But in my opinion, that's something that you should have control over, or at the very least, be trying to control. I'm not trying to be critical, I'm just trying to be honest. It messes with my spiritual life when I see you talking out of both sides of your mouth. I struggle with whether or not you can possibly still love Jesus and be okay with words like those just floating out at any interval. I mean, I might be a little more extreme than some. I scratch them out in my books so I don't have to look at them a second time, and I mute the TV whenever I think something like that is coming. But really, even after being in the "real world" for the last... almost 4 months, it still bothers me. And I'm still not giving in to pressure. So please, take the verses in the Bible about pure speech and taming your tongue to heart! You're not only damaging the image of what a "Christian" should look like, but you're confusing people like me who want to believe you are.
The next one. Ultimatums. I think the pastor at Resonate mentioned this last week, but when somebody gives you an ultimatum, even when it's something that you might normally want to do, your first instinct is to rebel and go to the other side. I'm really bad about this. Don't get me wrong, I am a huge fan of authority figures. I believe they're there for a reason. But whenever I get the "Do this or else" feeling, or the "You'll be going against the norm if you do...." feeling, guess what? I'm gonna try the "or else". I've been one who swims upstream my entire life. People who try to build a dam in the way, well, I'm going salmon-style and I'm gonna jump the waterfall in spite of you. This is probably a weakness...it's probably pride, I'll admit. But I've felt like I've had so many points this semester where it was one path or the other, and there was no going back once the decision was made. I can't stand those! I'm the girl who's going to try and find the path right down the middle that no one else has made before. To my credit, it tends to work out pretty well. And I see a lot of people following the same trail once it's been blazed.
People who hurt people I love. Let's just say it's a really good thing I don't say everything I think. Because there are a few people who really deserve a piece of my mind, but because I'm a self-controlled and somewhat mature person, I'm not going to. I don't want to be the cause of drama. They should know that I'm gonna be a lot more wary of them in the future, and if they ask me about it... well, that might be the open door for a 'real' discussion. But don't expect that you'll like what I have to say.
One might read these things and just kind of smile and nod. "Oh, she's venting." Sure, I guess. But I dare you to underestimate me. I've always been a very deep thinker. I process things thoroughly, and I often imagine conversations playing out. But I'm not confrontational. I wasn't the one to go up to someone and start a tough topic. Guess what? That's changing. Something I've been challenged to do in my conversations this year is be real with people. My friends and I aren't afraid to be honest. We call it how we see it, in as much love as possible. And we talk about the tough stuff. That was hard for me at first, but it's become really refreshing. I think people will be surprised at how much more up front I can be in conversations now. Things aren't rattling me as easy, and I'm not just going to gloss over something that I think we should talk about. That doesn't mean I think any less of you, or I'm any more mean. I'm just discovering how to voice my thoughts and be okay with that. If you don't like me for it, well....so be it.
* Free to Be Me, Francesca Battistelli
Apathy. Oh yes. I've known this one for a long time. But it's still good to refresh. I HATE apathy. I don't even care if you disagree with what I have to say, as long as you have your own opinion! People who drift by and go with the flow are so frustrating. I'm not saying like, people who are low-key or people who are flexible. That's totally different. I mean as far as your moral code goes. You DO or you DO NOT. But you can't say one thing to one person, and then something different to another. In high school, this was tricky, because everyone wants to be accepted. And really, high school is pretty judgemental. But the more I'm in college, the more I realize that people in the "real world" are mature enough to value individuality. You can agree to disagree, and you can have a mature, intelligent debate without tearing each other apart. But when you refuse to take a stand for anything, I'm sorry, but that just frustrates me. And you're really likely to rub me the wrong way.
Taking this a step farther ... I really really really don't like cursing. Duh. Anyone who's known me for more than a little while can attest that I have never said a curse word. I don't quote them when someone else says it, I don't write it down as a piece of dialogue. And I am so disheartened when people who should know better (aka: Christians) choose to do so. I know that everyone has struggles. I know that people have "grown up around it" and it's "normal" to them. But in my opinion, that's something that you should have control over, or at the very least, be trying to control. I'm not trying to be critical, I'm just trying to be honest. It messes with my spiritual life when I see you talking out of both sides of your mouth. I struggle with whether or not you can possibly still love Jesus and be okay with words like those just floating out at any interval. I mean, I might be a little more extreme than some. I scratch them out in my books so I don't have to look at them a second time, and I mute the TV whenever I think something like that is coming. But really, even after being in the "real world" for the last... almost 4 months, it still bothers me. And I'm still not giving in to pressure. So please, take the verses in the Bible about pure speech and taming your tongue to heart! You're not only damaging the image of what a "Christian" should look like, but you're confusing people like me who want to believe you are.
The next one. Ultimatums. I think the pastor at Resonate mentioned this last week, but when somebody gives you an ultimatum, even when it's something that you might normally want to do, your first instinct is to rebel and go to the other side. I'm really bad about this. Don't get me wrong, I am a huge fan of authority figures. I believe they're there for a reason. But whenever I get the "Do this or else" feeling, or the "You'll be going against the norm if you do...." feeling, guess what? I'm gonna try the "or else". I've been one who swims upstream my entire life. People who try to build a dam in the way, well, I'm going salmon-style and I'm gonna jump the waterfall in spite of you. This is probably a weakness...it's probably pride, I'll admit. But I've felt like I've had so many points this semester where it was one path or the other, and there was no going back once the decision was made. I can't stand those! I'm the girl who's going to try and find the path right down the middle that no one else has made before. To my credit, it tends to work out pretty well. And I see a lot of people following the same trail once it's been blazed.
People who hurt people I love. Let's just say it's a really good thing I don't say everything I think. Because there are a few people who really deserve a piece of my mind, but because I'm a self-controlled and somewhat mature person, I'm not going to. I don't want to be the cause of drama. They should know that I'm gonna be a lot more wary of them in the future, and if they ask me about it... well, that might be the open door for a 'real' discussion. But don't expect that you'll like what I have to say.
One might read these things and just kind of smile and nod. "Oh, she's venting." Sure, I guess. But I dare you to underestimate me. I've always been a very deep thinker. I process things thoroughly, and I often imagine conversations playing out. But I'm not confrontational. I wasn't the one to go up to someone and start a tough topic. Guess what? That's changing. Something I've been challenged to do in my conversations this year is be real with people. My friends and I aren't afraid to be honest. We call it how we see it, in as much love as possible. And we talk about the tough stuff. That was hard for me at first, but it's become really refreshing. I think people will be surprised at how much more up front I can be in conversations now. Things aren't rattling me as easy, and I'm not just going to gloss over something that I think we should talk about. That doesn't mean I think any less of you, or I'm any more mean. I'm just discovering how to voice my thoughts and be okay with that. If you don't like me for it, well....so be it.
* Free to Be Me, Francesca Battistelli
12.05.2010
"A thrill of hope... the weary world rejoices! For yonder breaks... a new and glorious morn!"
As is evident by this faabulous picture of the decorations in our window, our room is starting to look very festive. We've got icicle lights, snowflakes, a "stem" of a tree, and even some stockings! Everything is just so much home-y-er with all the decorations up. Cranking up the Christmas music from my newly created Pandora station! Gotta love it!
I'm trying to think of even what has gone on worth blogging about. Hmm.... it's almost finals week, and I'm surprisingly not that stressed. I've always treated finals, at least at LCC, as just another test. If I get in the "this makes or breaks my grade" mode, then my brain just gives up and goes into overload. So this weekend, I've just been trying to keep a "work/play" balance, like I normally would. I'm sure next weekend will be a little different, but ya know. :P
I've got to come up with some Christmas gift ideas for people! It's hard for me, since I usually struggle with creativity for the friends I know WELL. Let alone the ones that I've just started getting to know. Add in a college student's budget, and ... let's just say it's going to be interesting to see how it turns out. I'm home in like... 10 days! Wow!
It's so weird to get readjusted for such a short time. Because, really, I'm back into the "I like college" mood now. And I know that as soon as I'm home, I'll be in the "Yay, I'm home" mood. So confusing!! But it's good. It is. I'm constantly reminded why this was the right thing for me - just breaking out and starting new. I'm tired, but I'm so ... joyful.
Today, I walked to the Daily Grind to do my math homework, because I was just so unproductive sitting in my room. It's only a little over a half mile, and it was a great walk. After hanging out there for a few hours, I started the walk back, only to get distracted by my new favorite Pullman treasure - Bruised Books. :D It's such a cute used bookstore!! It's not really organized, books are kind of everywhere, but it's grouped by genre, which is enough for me to stay sane. And everything is a minimum of 50% off the cover price! I was such a happy person! Lol. So, explored there for a little while before coming back.
I guess that's all for tonight. :) I've just been so blessed this weekend. It's really been awesome.
*Oh Holy Night, traditional
11.28.2010
"Can we pretend like airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?"
And again, here I am on the plane – flying back from Portland to Spokane. I guess it’s only fair to write a post-Thanksgiving break entry. This was a great 9 days. I really hoped that it would go by slowly, and it has. Not in a boring way, just in a relaxed way. All of my new found free time helped the days go by slowly. I had lots of time at home, and still got to spend several days with friends. J It was really good… and I’m a little sad at having to kick back into study mode tomorrow. This plane is about 90% college students – all in their school sweatshirts, backpacks and textbooks in hand. I was waiting for my turn to board, watching them, and thinking “Do I really look that old??” How can I be nineteen already? This is like, the point in my life that I used to imagine when I was little. Going to a large, well-known university, with a plan for what I want to do, grown-up but not too grown up. .. and here it is. I just can’t believe it.
It was awesome to get to see everyone again. The party on Friday was so fun – even though it turned into a very movie-less movie night. Lol. Basically we just talked and once a few people left, then the Apples to Apples broke out. It felt so normal. I loved getting to just hear everyone’s voice and remember the random quirks that made me so happy to be friends. A lot of things have happened since we all were together, but we can still have a blast like no time has gone by. Myriah’s friend from college was there too, and she was commenting on how close we seemed. Yeah…. It’s pretty true. I mean, I didn’t just get to see my class. I hung out with a lot of other people too, and crashed school on Monday, which was fun. J Definitely different, being on the other side now. It’s a good different though, because I don’t really have any major regrets about high school, believe it or not.
On the downside, I did catch whatever bug was going around. I’d been doing really well, taking my vitamins and stuff, sleeping a lot, and then I got home feeling healthy and … BAM. About 24 hours later, well, I’m sick now. Peachy keen. :P
Back in the dorm! Unpacked and moved back in. My suitcase barely fits in the cupboard above my closet, so getting it down in a few weeks is gonna be entertaining. And I hung these super cool snowflakes on our window that Heidi and I made on Wednesday! So the room is officially Christmasy-ed up. Plus the foot of snow outside, it really looks like winter! I’ve got so much I should do, but I’m just too tired to mess with it right now. So here I am…updating the blogosphere and debating what I want to do with the rest of the night. It’s weird being back! It’s like the first week all over again, where I’ve been in the routine of being home and living the west-side life, and now I have to re-adjust to all of this again for 3 more weeks. * shakes head * It’s confusing! I’m happy to be back because this is “right”, but I already wish I could go back to the low-stress home life.
Anyhow, not much else new to say.
*Airplanes, B.o.B
"I'm goin home...to the place where I belong..." (Written 11/19)
Alright. I’m pretty much sitting in the back of an airplane right now. And when I say the back, I mean the VERY back. Like…almost falling out of the tail. Lol. It’s 12:08 pm on November the 19th. Also known as – Go Home Day! :D I finished packing last night, and all Alma and I had to do this morning was just get dressed and head down to the car, pretty much. Stopped at Starbucks for a fabulous Caramel Brulee Latte and a muffin, and then drove to Colfax to drop off my car before the ride to the airport.
It’s so weird to think that we’re going home. Like….it’s not a bad thing at all, because I’m excited. But as my roomie so wisely put it, “It’s like leaving home … to go home.” I’ve gotten used to thinking of our dorm room as home, which it kind of is because all of my life the last 3 months has revolved around Pullman. Last night I was done with all my school stuff by nine, and it was weird! Just sitting there packing and realizing that I don’t have anything I HAVE to do for over a week? The concept is foreign, seeing as every hour, every spare minute, in college can be used for something either social or school related. Time moves soo fast, and yet so slow. But life in general is a breakneck pace, always moving, always progressing. I don’t really know if I can switch my brain over into “chill” mode this week or not. And even if I could, I don’t think it’s such a good idea, seeing as I have to fly back and kick into intense study mode very soon anyhow. I know that people are going to comment on how “busy” I am… and it’s not even intentional anymore. But if my days aren’t filled with things to achieve or get done, I feel lazy! I can’t even help it! It’s also going to be interesting trying to adjust back to sharing an entire house with people, and like, having to explain where I’m going and when I’ll be back. Alma and I are pretty good about keeping each other updated on what’s going on in our days, but it’s not like we tell one another we “can’t” do something. It’s just more of a safety issue. We were talking this morning, and both kind of thought, “Hmm, it’s going to be weird not sharing a room for nine days!” I’ve never shared a room before this year, and I thought I’d hate it. But I really don’t. We each have our own space, and it’s great to know that somebody’s going to notice if you’re gone or if you need to talk. Plus, she’s just awesome. J We’re really getting along great, and I’m already feeling a little sad about the fact that our year together is almost halfway over. Crazy stuff man!
I guess that was kind of a digression, but one that I haven’t really addressed yet, so it was time. We’re crossing the Cascade mountains now! Supposed to be arriving a little bit early into Portland, and then I’ll pick up my (giant) suitcase from the baggage claim and go find my mom. J I don’t know if I’ll even get a chance to eat my airline peanuts or not. Haha.
Gosh, I’m going to be home in like…2 hours! I’m still going back and forth from super excited to almost nervous, just because I’m not sure what to expect. I’ve never done this before! Well, “all electronic devices need to be stowed”.
See you on the west side!
*Home, Daughtry
11.18.2010
"Happy Birthday tooo you...."
Well, it's been over 2 weeks since I posted last! I guess seeing as I leave TOMORROW for thanksgiving break.... probably should update. :)
Let's see....as predicted, the time has flown by. I'm really looking forward to being home, but this has been a great last couple of weeks. I even got a chance to drive to Yakima last week and support my TRCS volleyball team in the state tournament! :) Weird to be on the other side? Yes, it was. But at the same time, I know my time there is over. It's not like I quit partway through and missed stuff. Do I have regrets? Sure. But did I stick with it? Yes. It was great getting to go back and see them though, and encourage them (hopefully). Plus, the "alone time" to just rock out to my music in the car ride there and back was very fun.
Yesterday was my BIRTHDAY! :) I'm old. Lol. That was also a blast. I honestly didn't really care if anything happened or not, just because I've been so ready for thanksgiving that my birthday has sort of... been forgotten. By me. *shrug* But it was great! Everyone is just awesome, and even my brand-new friends did their best to make it special. :) I don't feel at all like I missed out on the celebration - even though I know my family is gonna want to party once I get back, I could be okay either way. I'm just not that materialistic! Well....I don't like OTHER people to be materialistic on my behalf. I still like stuff. Lol.
Anyhow, between now and when I'm done, I have a class, a mid-term, and a band concert. Back-to-back. So I'm wearing my concert clothes and looking like a geek. :) But whatevs. Then I get to come back here and finish packing! Alma and I are leaving here at (hopefully) about 7:30 tomorrow. She wanted to treat me to breakfast for my birthday, so we'll grab some coffee and a pastry or something and hit the road! Then dropping off my car at Nana and Bubba's house and they'll drive us up to Spokane to catch the plane!
Well, I've got a class in a half hour. :) Catch ya later, cyber world!
*Happy Birthday, Public domain
Let's see....as predicted, the time has flown by. I'm really looking forward to being home, but this has been a great last couple of weeks. I even got a chance to drive to Yakima last week and support my TRCS volleyball team in the state tournament! :) Weird to be on the other side? Yes, it was. But at the same time, I know my time there is over. It's not like I quit partway through and missed stuff. Do I have regrets? Sure. But did I stick with it? Yes. It was great getting to go back and see them though, and encourage them (hopefully). Plus, the "alone time" to just rock out to my music in the car ride there and back was very fun.
Yesterday was my BIRTHDAY! :) I'm old. Lol. That was also a blast. I honestly didn't really care if anything happened or not, just because I've been so ready for thanksgiving that my birthday has sort of... been forgotten. By me. *shrug* But it was great! Everyone is just awesome, and even my brand-new friends did their best to make it special. :) I don't feel at all like I missed out on the celebration - even though I know my family is gonna want to party once I get back, I could be okay either way. I'm just not that materialistic! Well....I don't like OTHER people to be materialistic on my behalf. I still like stuff. Lol.
Anyhow, between now and when I'm done, I have a class, a mid-term, and a band concert. Back-to-back. So I'm wearing my concert clothes and looking like a geek. :) But whatevs. Then I get to come back here and finish packing! Alma and I are leaving here at (hopefully) about 7:30 tomorrow. She wanted to treat me to breakfast for my birthday, so we'll grab some coffee and a pastry or something and hit the road! Then dropping off my car at Nana and Bubba's house and they'll drive us up to Spokane to catch the plane!
Well, I've got a class in a half hour. :) Catch ya later, cyber world!
*Happy Birthday, Public domain
11.04.2010
"Millions of peaches...peaches for me.... "
IT'S NOVEMBER!!!!!!!!!! (yes, that's a lot of exclamation points :D ) It really doesn't feel like November though. I mean, it's still 50+ degrees and sunny, and today I didn't even need a jacket walking back from class. I'm not complaining one bit. I know that the snow will hit soon enough, because everyone keeps saying how cold of a winter this is supposed to be. Plus, I also know that in Longview, it'd be wet AND cold. So bonus points for college! Lol. It's also really weird to think that there are really only 4 more weeks of classes between now and the end of the semester. Have I seriously been here that long?? Time sure flies, and yet creeps by. Crazy stuff man.... but it's good. It's very good.
I figured it was time to dedicate a blog to a more "practical" side of college life. So, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, this focuses on... that's right... food. Ahh, campus dining.... :P
Now, I'm not being critical. Northside (the dining center that receives 85% of my business) is excellent. There's always a wide selection, both of things you can count on always being there, and things that change daily. It's good food, and generally pretty healthy. But after 10 weeks of eating there, I've officially hit the "sick of dorm food" point. It was bound to happen eventually, I suppose. This week I've "cooked" more than I have since being here, and so between using a kitchen and several trips to the grocery store... let's just say that the fruit and veggies from a can are not looking quite as tasty anymore. I participated in a "focus group" for Freshens, our on-campus smoothie shop, yesterday, and we spent about an hour and a half talking about campus dining. And seriously, one girl mentioned peaches, and my mouth just started watering. We have peaches here, but they're the "covered in sugary syrup" kind that you get at a salad bar. No, I'm thinking fresh, just boiled and skinned, served warm over vanilla ice cream peaches. Wow.... how amazing do THOSE sound? Same with vegetables. I've been pretty much ruined to "out of a bag" veggies, seeing as we very rarely eat them at home, with the exception of peas. But you can taste the difference - produce section cook it yourself corn, carrots, and beans versus the frozen or canned stuff. Idk man....once you've eaten them fresh once it's pretty hard to go back. Which is one of the reasons that I am so ready for Thanksgiving!
Even when I was eating at home all the time, Thanksgiving is better than Christmas in my opinion as far as the food goes. (Okay, the christmas desserts are better, but I'm talking main meal) I'm going to make myself impatient just talking about it - the turkey with cranberry sauce, real mashed potatoes and gravy, or those cheesy ones that my grandma makes sometimes, green bean casserole (NOT from a bag), yams with raisins and marshmallows, jello-salad, the finger-friendly veggies, homemade rolls (*sighs happily*), and of course, two or three different kinds of pie with "real" whipped cream.... :D Yes, I plan to eat myself into a food coma. And drink milk. With dinner. Every night! Haha!
In all honesty, though, I probably will eat less than I usually do. I've gotten used to not taking seconds of anything, and snacking in limited amounts, so as much as I want to eat everything all at once, I doubt my stomach will be okay with that plan. In that way, I'm really grateful for the way WSU does their dining plan. Since you pay for everything you eat individually, it's harder to just gorge yourself unless you are doing it intentionally, or you don't have a limit to your dining plan. I'm eating plenty, I'm just not as worried about the whole freshman 15 thing. All my pants still fit, so I think I'm pretty stable. Lol.
I guess that's about all I have to say on the food topic for right now. I've just been thinking about peaches all day long and needed to rant about food for just a little while. Home in 16 days! :)
*Peaches, The Presidents of the United States of America
I figured it was time to dedicate a blog to a more "practical" side of college life. So, in the spirit of Thanksgiving, this focuses on... that's right... food. Ahh, campus dining.... :P
Now, I'm not being critical. Northside (the dining center that receives 85% of my business) is excellent. There's always a wide selection, both of things you can count on always being there, and things that change daily. It's good food, and generally pretty healthy. But after 10 weeks of eating there, I've officially hit the "sick of dorm food" point. It was bound to happen eventually, I suppose. This week I've "cooked" more than I have since being here, and so between using a kitchen and several trips to the grocery store... let's just say that the fruit and veggies from a can are not looking quite as tasty anymore. I participated in a "focus group" for Freshens, our on-campus smoothie shop, yesterday, and we spent about an hour and a half talking about campus dining. And seriously, one girl mentioned peaches, and my mouth just started watering. We have peaches here, but they're the "covered in sugary syrup" kind that you get at a salad bar. No, I'm thinking fresh, just boiled and skinned, served warm over vanilla ice cream peaches. Wow.... how amazing do THOSE sound? Same with vegetables. I've been pretty much ruined to "out of a bag" veggies, seeing as we very rarely eat them at home, with the exception of peas. But you can taste the difference - produce section cook it yourself corn, carrots, and beans versus the frozen or canned stuff. Idk man....once you've eaten them fresh once it's pretty hard to go back. Which is one of the reasons that I am so ready for Thanksgiving!
Even when I was eating at home all the time, Thanksgiving is better than Christmas in my opinion as far as the food goes. (Okay, the christmas desserts are better, but I'm talking main meal) I'm going to make myself impatient just talking about it - the turkey with cranberry sauce, real mashed potatoes and gravy, or those cheesy ones that my grandma makes sometimes, green bean casserole (NOT from a bag), yams with raisins and marshmallows, jello-salad, the finger-friendly veggies, homemade rolls (*sighs happily*), and of course, two or three different kinds of pie with "real" whipped cream.... :D Yes, I plan to eat myself into a food coma. And drink milk. With dinner. Every night! Haha!
In all honesty, though, I probably will eat less than I usually do. I've gotten used to not taking seconds of anything, and snacking in limited amounts, so as much as I want to eat everything all at once, I doubt my stomach will be okay with that plan. In that way, I'm really grateful for the way WSU does their dining plan. Since you pay for everything you eat individually, it's harder to just gorge yourself unless you are doing it intentionally, or you don't have a limit to your dining plan. I'm eating plenty, I'm just not as worried about the whole freshman 15 thing. All my pants still fit, so I think I'm pretty stable. Lol.
I guess that's about all I have to say on the food topic for right now. I've just been thinking about peaches all day long and needed to rant about food for just a little while. Home in 16 days! :)
*Peaches, The Presidents of the United States of America
10.31.2010
"In the shadow of our steeple, are all these lost and lonely people... searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me..."
Wow, it's been such a long time it feels since I last posted anything. And there's just a lot to say...I am afraid this entry might be a little random.
Start with the boring stuff - midterms. Gahh... they are not fun. I finished my last one on Wednesday night, and I've been pretty much brain dead since. I finally regained enough motivation to start doing homework again yesterday evening. But realistically, I've been doing too much "fun" stuff to get very much done. So Sunday and Monday are going to be very long days. So much to study.... and another french test on Thursday. Geez....
What else? Um, it's Halloween weekend. Apparently that's like the biggest thing since Christmas cookies in Pullman. Being from a family that usually did nothing Halloween-y on Halloween, I still fail to see the excitement. I guess if I was a creative minded person, dressing up like fun things would be pretty cool. But to me, coming up with a costume is just a pain. All these crazy people that are trying to be a Playboy cover version of "insert-random-occupation here", and just wander around, drink, yell, and dance.... there's not even any free chocolate involved! So what's the point, guys, really?
However, while on the topic of Halloween weekend, I did the coolest thing Friday night - Fratcakes. :) Basically, the church I'm going to sets up a tent and hands out free pancakes and hot chocolate to all of the people walking up and down greek row from 10-1. It was such a blast! We froze, we laughed, we had some great conversations with people. It was fun to see all the costumes, and enjoy people watching. I think we probably passed out 500-700 pancakes, and a lot of the time, I volunteered to put the syrup on them for the people, or get the hot chocolate so they wouldn't have to figure out which button was the right one. Idk, it was just awesome though. You wouldn't think it would mean so much - that one measly free pancake. Key word - free. Between their choice expletives, most people were raving about how nice we were for doing this, and asking what charity this was for, or why we were giving them pancakes, or what made us want to do it. Talk about open door, right? Our basic answer was just, "We're with Resonate church, and we're just out here because we love you guys. So have a great night!" At first I was like...um..., what do I say? But I realized - I really do love doing stuff like that. I love the service. I've missed things like Key Club. And I do love those people. Sober or not. :)
Earlier that night, I went to a birthday party for my friend Christy. She's a foreign exchange student from China who went on the Fall Retreat with Chi Alpha, and so I met her there. What did I get her for a birthday gift? Chocolate, bubbles, and silly string. Hecka-yes! It was adorable too, because a lot of the guests were Chinese, and they hadn't seen silly string before! Also, what did she want to play for a birthday game? "Truths and Dare". ;) Yes, I explained Truth or Dare to 4 Chinese 20 year olds. Love it! And one of Christy's friends, "Angel", and I also really hit it off. Idk what it is, we just get along really well. She's a total sweetheart, and just seems like she really wants people to hang out with and to talk to. So tonight, Angel, Christy and I went to the Halloween Dance at McCroskey, and then went back to Angel's dorm and just hung out and talked for a while. They're just fun! I'm excited to get to know them better over this year. International students just make me happy.
In other news - the countdown to Thanksgiving has officially begun! Woot! I'm almost surprised though, time really has gone soo fast. Faster than high school time, but slower in some ways as well. I'm really looking forward to going back and seeing everybody again. I miss them a lot. I can't even imagine what it will be like though - we all have 3 months of stories to tell, and if everybody else has grown as much as I have, there will definitely be some changes in people. But I'm ready to see them. :D And I'm already tasting the food in my imagination. Ate dinner at Denny's tonight, and had a roll with my meal that just baarely reminded me of Aunt Kathy's potato rolls.... *sighs happily* Yes. I'm going to be a pig at Thanksgiving. No, I don't care. Hahaha.....
Well, that's it for now, I guess. I probably should try and get a little more sleep tonight than I did last night. We'll see how that goes. :)p
*Does Anybody Hear Her, Casting Crowns
Start with the boring stuff - midterms. Gahh... they are not fun. I finished my last one on Wednesday night, and I've been pretty much brain dead since. I finally regained enough motivation to start doing homework again yesterday evening. But realistically, I've been doing too much "fun" stuff to get very much done. So Sunday and Monday are going to be very long days. So much to study.... and another french test on Thursday. Geez....
What else? Um, it's Halloween weekend. Apparently that's like the biggest thing since Christmas cookies in Pullman. Being from a family that usually did nothing Halloween-y on Halloween, I still fail to see the excitement. I guess if I was a creative minded person, dressing up like fun things would be pretty cool. But to me, coming up with a costume is just a pain. All these crazy people that are trying to be a Playboy cover version of "insert-random-occupation here", and just wander around, drink, yell, and dance.... there's not even any free chocolate involved! So what's the point, guys, really?
However, while on the topic of Halloween weekend, I did the coolest thing Friday night - Fratcakes. :) Basically, the church I'm going to sets up a tent and hands out free pancakes and hot chocolate to all of the people walking up and down greek row from 10-1. It was such a blast! We froze, we laughed, we had some great conversations with people. It was fun to see all the costumes, and enjoy people watching. I think we probably passed out 500-700 pancakes, and a lot of the time, I volunteered to put the syrup on them for the people, or get the hot chocolate so they wouldn't have to figure out which button was the right one. Idk, it was just awesome though. You wouldn't think it would mean so much - that one measly free pancake. Key word - free. Between their choice expletives, most people were raving about how nice we were for doing this, and asking what charity this was for, or why we were giving them pancakes, or what made us want to do it. Talk about open door, right? Our basic answer was just, "We're with Resonate church, and we're just out here because we love you guys. So have a great night!" At first I was like...um..., what do I say? But I realized - I really do love doing stuff like that. I love the service. I've missed things like Key Club. And I do love those people. Sober or not. :)
Earlier that night, I went to a birthday party for my friend Christy. She's a foreign exchange student from China who went on the Fall Retreat with Chi Alpha, and so I met her there. What did I get her for a birthday gift? Chocolate, bubbles, and silly string. Hecka-yes! It was adorable too, because a lot of the guests were Chinese, and they hadn't seen silly string before! Also, what did she want to play for a birthday game? "Truths and Dare". ;) Yes, I explained Truth or Dare to 4 Chinese 20 year olds. Love it! And one of Christy's friends, "Angel", and I also really hit it off. Idk what it is, we just get along really well. She's a total sweetheart, and just seems like she really wants people to hang out with and to talk to. So tonight, Angel, Christy and I went to the Halloween Dance at McCroskey, and then went back to Angel's dorm and just hung out and talked for a while. They're just fun! I'm excited to get to know them better over this year. International students just make me happy.
In other news - the countdown to Thanksgiving has officially begun! Woot! I'm almost surprised though, time really has gone soo fast. Faster than high school time, but slower in some ways as well. I'm really looking forward to going back and seeing everybody again. I miss them a lot. I can't even imagine what it will be like though - we all have 3 months of stories to tell, and if everybody else has grown as much as I have, there will definitely be some changes in people. But I'm ready to see them. :D And I'm already tasting the food in my imagination. Ate dinner at Denny's tonight, and had a roll with my meal that just baarely reminded me of Aunt Kathy's potato rolls.... *sighs happily* Yes. I'm going to be a pig at Thanksgiving. No, I don't care. Hahaha.....
Well, that's it for now, I guess. I probably should try and get a little more sleep tonight than I did last night. We'll see how that goes. :)p
*Does Anybody Hear Her, Casting Crowns
10.13.2010
"Three in the morning, and I'm still awake...so I picked up a pen and a page..."
"I started writing, just what I'd say, if we were face to face.
I'd tell you just what you mean to me, tell you these simple truths:
Be strong in the Lord, and never give up hope.
You're gonna do great things, I already know.
God's got his hand on you, so, don't live life in fear.
Forgive and forget but don't forget why you're here.
Take your time, and pray.
These are the words I would say."
This week has been crazy for so many people. I watch facebook, I text, I skype.... yeah, I'm pretty much doing everything I can to stay in touch with people's lives. There's stuff happening that I wish I was there to see and to experience, I wish I was there to encourage in person, but I can't be. And I don't know of a "non-creepy" way to explain how much I want to be without coming across as clingy. But I just love you guys. I get so excited for you when good stuff is happening, and I hurt for you when I know you are hurting. This kind of passion has to spill over somewhere. So I just want you guys to know....it's been spilling over where it counts - prayer. I'll think of somebody during the day, and start to pray for them and their situation, and then another person comes to mind, and another. This has just led to me going through the list (I go in order of how we sat in Bible last year so I don't forget anyone), and I pray for each of you by name. Specific things that God's put on my heart to pray for you.
Take tonight for example. I was at Chi Alpha, and it was an awesome time of worship. Everyone was praying for one another, and I just sat down and thought about how much I hoped that everyone was getting as plugged in to a community as I have been. And I started praying, and the words just wouldn't stop! I wished that the songs would have gone on longer, because I could've sat there and prayed for you all even longer. Just know that I'm not going to stop. No matter how distant we become, you're my family, and I love you. And I so want you to experience the richness of life as I am.
On that note, I'd like to just encourage you again, get involved in a church, guys. It's been the best way for God to stretch me - coming to this place, out of my comfort zone, completely removed from the familiar, I've been able to grow so much. I know that I'm different. I know more about myself than I have before, and I realize how much my fears and my "routine" were holding me back from being as open as I should have been. Is it hard to make yourself want to get plugged in somewhere new? Yes. Is it awkward at first, sharing your deepest spiritual issues with strangers? Yes. But is it also enlightening, eye-opening, life-changing, and healthy? Yes. So just do it! I promise you, you won't regret it. I can't even begin to explain how cool it is to notice that the phrase "the joy of the Lord is your strength" has gone farther than being a simple catchphrase. It's so true! I've always been a positive person, but I'm filled with joy now that really, I can't explain. I just want to dance and sing every day, because God is just that good!
My friends... I miss you guys a lot. But I know that Thanksgiving is only 5 weeks away, and I can't wait to just talk to you about life, and enjoy time together. Know that I'll be praying for you every step of the way, and that there's so much more out there for you if you only seek it. :)
*The Words I Would Say, Sidewalk Prophets
10.10.2010
"But if you try sometimes...you'll find... you get what you need."
It's been a pretty good week this week. Granted, I haven't gotten any results back yet from the chemistry quiz that I know I failed. Thank goodness we get to drop our 2 lowest scores from the semester. But aside from that, I really wrapped my brain around the math concepts, and I've had lunch/coffee with someone 3 days this week. Not so easy on my cash flow, but totally worth it. :) I'm definitely starting to get into a routine, which is good. This week was homecoming week, so there were tons of people here and lots of events going on. I didn't catch too many due to other commitments but I did go to the bonfire Friday night and the game on Saturday. Both really fun. I've discovered how much I love sporting events. Haha. There's just something very "school-spirity" about them. Not that I know ANY thing about football, but it's still cool. I'm super excited for basketball season - a: because we're actually pretty decent, and b: because I will be able to know what's going on due to my dedication last year as TRCS team photographer! Ahh...I will miss watching the Eagles, though. It's fun here because there's always a massive crowd. It was fun there because a: proportionally, it was a massive crowd, and b: because I knew everyone on the team. Luckily, the season overlaps C-mas break, so *crosses fingers* I'll get to see a game or two anyhow. Not so with volleyball. *glare* I still say.... WEBCAM! Somebody install one in the gym, please??
I don't really have any deep insight to share.... next weekend is Dad's Weekend so there'll be a lot of stuff going on which should be cool. However, that DOES mean that I have to get ahead on my homework so I can justify having time to just waste away. Oh well....I don't mind.
Cleaned tonight, because it was TIME. :) Washed the mirrors and dusted all the flat surfaces. Oh - and did the dishes. So now everything is ready to go. We still really need to vacuum in here, but lugging the vacuum up from the main floor is a pain, because it's loud and very heavy.
As of Friday, I've reached the "halfway" point to Thanksgiving. Only a few more weeks to go! I'm excited to see everyone again - though it'll probably be a little weird to some extent. Like, we all have so many new stories to tell, it will take forever to get caught up on everyone's life. Hopefully the time will pass slowly and I'll be able to savor it and not feel rushed through stuff.
*You Can't Always Get What You Want - Glee Cast version
I don't really have any deep insight to share.... next weekend is Dad's Weekend so there'll be a lot of stuff going on which should be cool. However, that DOES mean that I have to get ahead on my homework so I can justify having time to just waste away. Oh well....I don't mind.
Cleaned tonight, because it was TIME. :) Washed the mirrors and dusted all the flat surfaces. Oh - and did the dishes. So now everything is ready to go. We still really need to vacuum in here, but lugging the vacuum up from the main floor is a pain, because it's loud and very heavy.
As of Friday, I've reached the "halfway" point to Thanksgiving. Only a few more weeks to go! I'm excited to see everyone again - though it'll probably be a little weird to some extent. Like, we all have so many new stories to tell, it will take forever to get caught up on everyone's life. Hopefully the time will pass slowly and I'll be able to savor it and not feel rushed through stuff.
*You Can't Always Get What You Want - Glee Cast version
10.04.2010
"Time keeps on slippin'...into the future..."
I've got a lot of "serious" stuff that I feel will become a blog entry later this week. But I've been wanting to post something random and fun instead - little quirks/things that I've noticed since being here.
1) Since 2nd grade, I've been able to hear Mrs Herren's voice in my head saying , "Second graders, stay to your right..." as we walked past another group of people, thereby drilling into my head the fact that when you're heading towards somebody, each person veers to their right. However, here on campus, about 75% of people that I am walking towards choose to veer left. They go in the left side of the doors, left of the sidewalk....creating that awkward dance when you're trying to figure out who is going to surrender their side or not. It's just...strange. :)p
2) Fitness is a major focus of this campus (I don't know about other schools). Everyone is always talking about going to the rec, going for a run, the calorie information is posted EVERYwhere for the food places, and there's a big "eat healthy" focus in the cafeterias. However, it's also more expensive to eat healthy, and there are constantly junk food options being offered. Maybe it's just because it's the beginning of the year, or because I haven't really paid attention, but there are also not very many "large" people walking around. Everyone is skinny to average, thereby making average people like myself feel "larger". Lol.
3) It doesn't matter what you've been asked to do or go to, or who is asking you. If you say "I can't, I have to study/have homework," no further questions are asked. If you say "I can't, sorry," the next question is "Why, what else is going on?"
4) They always say that college is the time to try anything you want. It's really true. If I want to do ANYthing, any activity, any club, I can. And there's very few people who will give it a second thought when you say that you're joining/trying it.
5) Yes, getting "off campus" is that big of a deal. I get really, really excited when I run out of milk and have to make a 30 minute errand to Safeway. And I'll stand in the entry way for a few moments just breathing in the taste of civilization. It's not that we're lacking for entertainment, or food, or places to chill while we're in college. It's just that feeling that you're always "at work". The campus may be hundreds of acres, but by the middle of the week, it feels very, very small. And after walking all day every day, sitting in a moving vehicle is rather exhilarating. :)
6) Everyone from western Washington complains about the rain. Everyone who is from western WA and comes here is super happy to see the sunshine every day. And then once it starts to rain (which has been three times since August, btw), all of my western WA friends' facebook statuses turn to being really excited to see rain. Mine included. :)p
7) Time is a very weird thing. Days and hours tick by slow, and you look at the calendar and say "Oh my gosh, it's only Monday..." and then you wake up on Saturday and say "Wow...that week just flew!".
Ie: At this moment, 46 days sounds like a really long time. However, I pause and say, "Wasn't it just labor day weekend?" and realize that a month goes by a lot faster than you expect sometimes.
*Fly Like an Eagle, Steve Miller
1) Since 2nd grade, I've been able to hear Mrs Herren's voice in my head saying , "Second graders, stay to your right..." as we walked past another group of people, thereby drilling into my head the fact that when you're heading towards somebody, each person veers to their right. However, here on campus, about 75% of people that I am walking towards choose to veer left. They go in the left side of the doors, left of the sidewalk....creating that awkward dance when you're trying to figure out who is going to surrender their side or not. It's just...strange. :)p
2) Fitness is a major focus of this campus (I don't know about other schools). Everyone is always talking about going to the rec, going for a run, the calorie information is posted EVERYwhere for the food places, and there's a big "eat healthy" focus in the cafeterias. However, it's also more expensive to eat healthy, and there are constantly junk food options being offered. Maybe it's just because it's the beginning of the year, or because I haven't really paid attention, but there are also not very many "large" people walking around. Everyone is skinny to average, thereby making average people like myself feel "larger". Lol.
3) It doesn't matter what you've been asked to do or go to, or who is asking you. If you say "I can't, I have to study/have homework," no further questions are asked. If you say "I can't, sorry," the next question is "Why, what else is going on?"
4) They always say that college is the time to try anything you want. It's really true. If I want to do ANYthing, any activity, any club, I can. And there's very few people who will give it a second thought when you say that you're joining/trying it.
5) Yes, getting "off campus" is that big of a deal. I get really, really excited when I run out of milk and have to make a 30 minute errand to Safeway. And I'll stand in the entry way for a few moments just breathing in the taste of civilization. It's not that we're lacking for entertainment, or food, or places to chill while we're in college. It's just that feeling that you're always "at work". The campus may be hundreds of acres, but by the middle of the week, it feels very, very small. And after walking all day every day, sitting in a moving vehicle is rather exhilarating. :)
6) Everyone from western Washington complains about the rain. Everyone who is from western WA and comes here is super happy to see the sunshine every day. And then once it starts to rain (which has been three times since August, btw), all of my western WA friends' facebook statuses turn to being really excited to see rain. Mine included. :)p
7) Time is a very weird thing. Days and hours tick by slow, and you look at the calendar and say "Oh my gosh, it's only Monday..." and then you wake up on Saturday and say "Wow...that week just flew!".
Ie: At this moment, 46 days sounds like a really long time. However, I pause and say, "Wasn't it just labor day weekend?" and realize that a month goes by a lot faster than you expect sometimes.
*Fly Like an Eagle, Steve Miller
9.28.2010
"It just takes some time, little girl, you're in the middle of the ride..."
I'm having another one of those "I should update my blog" days, even though I don't really have a specific topic to talk about today. Feeling a little overwhelmed with homework, and even though my mid-term scores came back satisfactorily, I still am not used to feeling like I don't know how to guarantee that my grade is where I want it to be.
Is it sad that I'm already trying to plan out my schedule for next semester? I don't even know why I'm already trying to map things out when I should be focusing on what's going on right now. Maybe if I have the "next step" in line it's sub-consciously the light at the end of the tunnel? And I've got to take more credits than I am this semester, so that's going to be another change. Just adding onto the homework I guess. Lol.
This last weekend was super fun -- my family came up, and so I had lots of "chill" time where I didn't have to think about homework. :) Obviously, that means I have to hit the ground running this week to try and get back in the focus of school. It's so easy just to let everything I've learned just fall out of my head if I don't constantly work on school. I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving (52 days... :D) , but at the same time, I'm like, "How can I take 10 days off of homework and still remember anything when I get back?" I go without homework for 24 hours and it's hard to stay focused the next day! The other thing I did this weekend was get to see Myriah's volleyball team play up in Spokane. :) That was so much fun. I miss volleyball a lot...just the team feeling of it, yelling until your throat hurts, feeling in super good shape....
Anyhow, I got to talk to her for a few minutes after the game. :) It's crazy how much I've missed her - and everyone from school really - and I didn't even completely realize until we were just talking again. That's the down-side I guess, of our small school. I'm so attached to people. We've all known one another for so long, and always been together. It almost feels like I'm cheating to be having a "new" life without them, and I feel a little frustrated at them for having a new life without me! Granted, I know that it's supposed to work like this. And I'm not mad at people for following the path of their lives that they've been called to walk. But sometimes I wish that at least a few people had been called to the same path I have. I meet tons of people from huge high schools who have multiple friends from their classes here, and I am a little jealous, can't lie. I've loved meeting new people, and I really like the new friends I'm making. I just would love to have a few people here who've known me longer than a month... people who I know are on the same page and who know me so completely.
I'll probably look back and wonder why I wrote this slightly nostalgic and depressing entry...but it wouldn't be a true blog unless this was more than just my "life-is-wonderful" days. I'm tired, and just in one of those moods where life seems way out of the realm of my control. I guess that's good practice for me - life shouldn't be in MY control at all, much as I want it to be. Time is just weird. I don't want to move backwards, necessarily, but I just wish that some of the past could have joined me in the future. It's tricky business, this getting old stuff....
*The Middle, Jimmy Eat World
Is it sad that I'm already trying to plan out my schedule for next semester? I don't even know why I'm already trying to map things out when I should be focusing on what's going on right now. Maybe if I have the "next step" in line it's sub-consciously the light at the end of the tunnel? And I've got to take more credits than I am this semester, so that's going to be another change. Just adding onto the homework I guess. Lol.
This last weekend was super fun -- my family came up, and so I had lots of "chill" time where I didn't have to think about homework. :) Obviously, that means I have to hit the ground running this week to try and get back in the focus of school. It's so easy just to let everything I've learned just fall out of my head if I don't constantly work on school. I'm looking forward to Thanksgiving (52 days... :D) , but at the same time, I'm like, "How can I take 10 days off of homework and still remember anything when I get back?" I go without homework for 24 hours and it's hard to stay focused the next day! The other thing I did this weekend was get to see Myriah's volleyball team play up in Spokane. :) That was so much fun. I miss volleyball a lot...just the team feeling of it, yelling until your throat hurts, feeling in super good shape....
Anyhow, I got to talk to her for a few minutes after the game. :) It's crazy how much I've missed her - and everyone from school really - and I didn't even completely realize until we were just talking again. That's the down-side I guess, of our small school. I'm so attached to people. We've all known one another for so long, and always been together. It almost feels like I'm cheating to be having a "new" life without them, and I feel a little frustrated at them for having a new life without me! Granted, I know that it's supposed to work like this. And I'm not mad at people for following the path of their lives that they've been called to walk. But sometimes I wish that at least a few people had been called to the same path I have. I meet tons of people from huge high schools who have multiple friends from their classes here, and I am a little jealous, can't lie. I've loved meeting new people, and I really like the new friends I'm making. I just would love to have a few people here who've known me longer than a month... people who I know are on the same page and who know me so completely.
I'll probably look back and wonder why I wrote this slightly nostalgic and depressing entry...but it wouldn't be a true blog unless this was more than just my "life-is-wonderful" days. I'm tired, and just in one of those moods where life seems way out of the realm of my control. I guess that's good practice for me - life shouldn't be in MY control at all, much as I want it to be. Time is just weird. I don't want to move backwards, necessarily, but I just wish that some of the past could have joined me in the future. It's tricky business, this getting old stuff....
*The Middle, Jimmy Eat World
9.22.2010
"Good grades aren't what they seem...."
*heavy sigh* Such a long week.... but it's on the downhill stretch now!
I had my first "midterm" tonight. Calculus. Only 9 questions - but of course, some of them had part a-c, and the entire thing is worth a whopping 100 points.
It's funny how much stress homework can cause! I mean, in high school, homework was just a passing nuisance. As long as you kind of understood the concepts, you can fake your way through most of it, just regurgitating what was in the example problems or the lecture. Fill-in-the-blank exactly like the review sheet. Oh no...not any more. Homework is intentionally tricky. There's always something to be doing, because if you get even a little bit behind, well, you're pretty much up a creek without a paddle for the next week.
And with high school stuff, you have a class for a semester or an entire year. The amount of points possible is in the thousands. So naturally, you have the option of blowing off a few things, or failing a few assignments and it really doesn't change much in the long run. Here, this test I took tonight is 20 percent of the points I get all semester. Aka: if I bomb this, I've got to pull straight As for the next 2 months to average it up! So much stress! I basically sat down and felt like I was going to either get sick or pass out. Then of course, I breathe, and tell myself to take it easy and go one small step at a time and try and process the question. I think I did okay. But there are a few that I'm pretty sure I got wrong, which means that I'm looking at a B? Maybe?
That's weird for me too! I'm like, excited about the prospect of getting a B. From someone who was about ready to cry after my LCC A minus, that's a big transition. But I knew coming into college that I wasn't gonna be able to be the smart kid all the time anymore. I've adjusted my expectations for myself. Not that I'm not still trying for the A. I just don't make that my "standard", at least not this semester. The good news is, they say that your freshman semester is the lowest GPA you pull while in college. So it can only get better from here, right?
But yeah. Finished one midterm, and I have to turn around and study tonight and all day tomorrow for my chemistry mid-term tomorrow night. Ain't no rest for the wicked, I guess. ;) However, I was having a really great day today, which made it a lot easier to be motivated for a long day today and tomorrow. And then my family comes!! Yay for Mom's bday weekend and an excuse to not think about school!
I'm really missing all of my friends back home this week. Everyone starting LCC...going to classes together... Not going to lie - even though this is the right place for me, there are moments where I wish I would have just taken the easy way out. Of course, I still would've had to say goodbye to those who went away, so in either scenario it would have been hard. I just wish everyone would've come here with me! We could be out of Longview, have space to meet new people and stuff, but still been that security blanket. I know it's not how life works. But I just don't want to lose touch with my "brothers and sisters"! I <3 them! And it's weird not knowing how everyone's life is going! Even though Thanksgiving is a short break for most people (except me, hahaha, yay semester schools), I still want to see them all again before Christmas!
It is a weird time in life... that's all I gotta say about that....
*College Kids, Relient K
I had my first "midterm" tonight. Calculus. Only 9 questions - but of course, some of them had part a-c, and the entire thing is worth a whopping 100 points.
It's funny how much stress homework can cause! I mean, in high school, homework was just a passing nuisance. As long as you kind of understood the concepts, you can fake your way through most of it, just regurgitating what was in the example problems or the lecture. Fill-in-the-blank exactly like the review sheet. Oh no...not any more. Homework is intentionally tricky. There's always something to be doing, because if you get even a little bit behind, well, you're pretty much up a creek without a paddle for the next week.
And with high school stuff, you have a class for a semester or an entire year. The amount of points possible is in the thousands. So naturally, you have the option of blowing off a few things, or failing a few assignments and it really doesn't change much in the long run. Here, this test I took tonight is 20 percent of the points I get all semester. Aka: if I bomb this, I've got to pull straight As for the next 2 months to average it up! So much stress! I basically sat down and felt like I was going to either get sick or pass out. Then of course, I breathe, and tell myself to take it easy and go one small step at a time and try and process the question. I think I did okay. But there are a few that I'm pretty sure I got wrong, which means that I'm looking at a B? Maybe?
That's weird for me too! I'm like, excited about the prospect of getting a B. From someone who was about ready to cry after my LCC A minus, that's a big transition. But I knew coming into college that I wasn't gonna be able to be the smart kid all the time anymore. I've adjusted my expectations for myself. Not that I'm not still trying for the A. I just don't make that my "standard", at least not this semester. The good news is, they say that your freshman semester is the lowest GPA you pull while in college. So it can only get better from here, right?
But yeah. Finished one midterm, and I have to turn around and study tonight and all day tomorrow for my chemistry mid-term tomorrow night. Ain't no rest for the wicked, I guess. ;) However, I was having a really great day today, which made it a lot easier to be motivated for a long day today and tomorrow. And then my family comes!! Yay for Mom's bday weekend and an excuse to not think about school!
I'm really missing all of my friends back home this week. Everyone starting LCC...going to classes together... Not going to lie - even though this is the right place for me, there are moments where I wish I would have just taken the easy way out. Of course, I still would've had to say goodbye to those who went away, so in either scenario it would have been hard. I just wish everyone would've come here with me! We could be out of Longview, have space to meet new people and stuff, but still been that security blanket. I know it's not how life works. But I just don't want to lose touch with my "brothers and sisters"! I <3 them! And it's weird not knowing how everyone's life is going! Even though Thanksgiving is a short break for most people (except me, hahaha, yay semester schools), I still want to see them all again before Christmas!
It is a weird time in life... that's all I gotta say about that....
*College Kids, Relient K
9.18.2010
"And I play songs back to back until I go to bed..."
I'm not really sure where this post is going to go... I just feel that it's important to keep a regular schedule if I'm going to be an official part of the blog-o-sphere. Haha....
This has been such a stressful week! My first round of midterms began on Thursday, and I have another two tests next week. It's just so much homework, busy work, places to go, things to do.... I mean, I'm good at juggling a lot of commitments. But I'm also used to feeling like if I drop one, it's possible to pick it back up and keep going at the same pace. Not here. If I drop one, it starts this giant downward spiral of falling behind in classes. I feel like every hour has extreme significance, and it can't go to waste without good reason. If I'm in my room for more than 15 or 20 minutes, and I haven't started something "productive", I feel guilty. Granted, I try and keep it reasonable. If I've gotten enough done on my daily to-do list, I will justify spending some time on hulu, or hanging out with people, or whatever. But it's hard to let up on this pace at all, because once I start relaxing, it's really hard to get myself back into gear.
To any of you still in high school - be happy for the classes that give you lots of homework. The ones that have papers due, tests on the same week as other assignments, etc. Because that is SO the real world. Example: for my chemistry class, we have weekly online homework (20+ problems, and they're not "quick" ones), lectures MWF, weekly quizzes over the lecture material, a pre-lab due before our 3 hour lab time, and then a TON of calculations, post-lab questions, and a discussion over what the importance of it was, all due by the beginning of the next lab. So, add studying for a midterm on top of that, and you have my week. That's one class. Time management is so vital! I've never been more glad to have taken some "hard" classes through LCC. At least I had a clue of what I was getting into, and got the experience of this much homework at such a fast moving pace. I honestly don't know if I would survive without that experience. Not that I'm saying to ditch high school! Please, please, enjoy as much of your high school experience as you can. But if you get a chance to take one or two college classes before college actually comes - DO IT. Just enough to get your "feet wet".
So yeah, it has been a stressful week. And next week is looking just about as bad, but I've had such an awesome weekend. Friday I was able to have a slow afternoon, doing homework, watched some TV, spent the evening flopped on the floor. But it was really productive! And a good day, too. I felt really confident in my chemistry quiz, and I actually understood the calculus lecture! It's the little things in life, okay? Today I got to sleep in! Yay! And do laundry, vacuum, etc. for a very slow morning. Plus, I've finished a lot more of the chemistry stuff I have left, and worked on a bunch of math. Then tonight I walked down to my friend Aimee's house (she shares it with a bunch of roomies) and we had a movie night! I've missed sitting on a couch...with popcorn...just not worried about all the stuff I have to do. :) Plus, it's Saturday night. In Pullman. Therefore, everyone is out of the dorm and off doing whatever. Haha, except me! Nights are me time! Playlists, books, the random homework I decide to do....
And tomorrow is still an entire day! I'm feeling much more confident about being able to survive next week. My family is coming over Thursday night to stay the weekend, which is why it's so important to me to be a little bit ahead of schedule as far as the homework goes. I don't want to feel that looming over my head when I just want to have fun with them and not worry about school.
Well, that's really about all I have. It's 11:45pm, and I might just get ready for bed, review some flashcards, and get a full 8 or 9 hours in tonight! We'll see.... :D
*Melody - Kate Earl
This has been such a stressful week! My first round of midterms began on Thursday, and I have another two tests next week. It's just so much homework, busy work, places to go, things to do.... I mean, I'm good at juggling a lot of commitments. But I'm also used to feeling like if I drop one, it's possible to pick it back up and keep going at the same pace. Not here. If I drop one, it starts this giant downward spiral of falling behind in classes. I feel like every hour has extreme significance, and it can't go to waste without good reason. If I'm in my room for more than 15 or 20 minutes, and I haven't started something "productive", I feel guilty. Granted, I try and keep it reasonable. If I've gotten enough done on my daily to-do list, I will justify spending some time on hulu, or hanging out with people, or whatever. But it's hard to let up on this pace at all, because once I start relaxing, it's really hard to get myself back into gear.
To any of you still in high school - be happy for the classes that give you lots of homework. The ones that have papers due, tests on the same week as other assignments, etc. Because that is SO the real world. Example: for my chemistry class, we have weekly online homework (20+ problems, and they're not "quick" ones), lectures MWF, weekly quizzes over the lecture material, a pre-lab due before our 3 hour lab time, and then a TON of calculations, post-lab questions, and a discussion over what the importance of it was, all due by the beginning of the next lab. So, add studying for a midterm on top of that, and you have my week. That's one class. Time management is so vital! I've never been more glad to have taken some "hard" classes through LCC. At least I had a clue of what I was getting into, and got the experience of this much homework at such a fast moving pace. I honestly don't know if I would survive without that experience. Not that I'm saying to ditch high school! Please, please, enjoy as much of your high school experience as you can. But if you get a chance to take one or two college classes before college actually comes - DO IT. Just enough to get your "feet wet".
So yeah, it has been a stressful week. And next week is looking just about as bad, but I've had such an awesome weekend. Friday I was able to have a slow afternoon, doing homework, watched some TV, spent the evening flopped on the floor. But it was really productive! And a good day, too. I felt really confident in my chemistry quiz, and I actually understood the calculus lecture! It's the little things in life, okay? Today I got to sleep in! Yay! And do laundry, vacuum, etc. for a very slow morning. Plus, I've finished a lot more of the chemistry stuff I have left, and worked on a bunch of math. Then tonight I walked down to my friend Aimee's house (she shares it with a bunch of roomies) and we had a movie night! I've missed sitting on a couch...with popcorn...just not worried about all the stuff I have to do. :) Plus, it's Saturday night. In Pullman. Therefore, everyone is out of the dorm and off doing whatever. Haha, except me! Nights are me time! Playlists, books, the random homework I decide to do....
And tomorrow is still an entire day! I'm feeling much more confident about being able to survive next week. My family is coming over Thursday night to stay the weekend, which is why it's so important to me to be a little bit ahead of schedule as far as the homework goes. I don't want to feel that looming over my head when I just want to have fun with them and not worry about school.
Well, that's really about all I have. It's 11:45pm, and I might just get ready for bed, review some flashcards, and get a full 8 or 9 hours in tonight! We'll see.... :D
*Melody - Kate Earl
9.12.2010
"...so what can I say? And what can I do?"
Haha! I'm so good - two posts in three days. :)
I guess this is just another unravelling entry, getting further into the explanation of my life as a college student. One thing I've really had to make a conscious effort to do here is to pursue faith. It's funny - it's never something I've had to really do, at least not to this magnitude. Faith has been literally brought to me. It's been my choice, obviously, to believe or not, and to what degree I actually live it. And I thought I was doing pretty well.
Coming here, I've learned a lot about how crucial the Christian community really is in my life. The first week of WSU none of the ministries were meeting. And I was drowning - in a giant pool of loneliness and self-pity. Although I was meeting people, it was obvious how far away we were from one another spiritually, and it just creates this bubble of total isolation. The first time I went to a campus group, I was literally more emotionally fragile than I think I've ever been. And EVERYthing made me cry. The person sitting next to me asked how I was, and I almost lost it. Because when you spend your entire life, your entire existence, taking Christian fellowship for granted, it's amazing how fast you dry up. I've learned what it means to be truly "thirsty" for God, and I've had to be bold about who I am.
It's like, the second that you meet someone now, you get an idea of where they stand. There's such an obvious difference between light and dark in people - something I wasn't used to noticing before. It's really true - Jesus shines THROUGH people.
I've been so excited to start finding people that I identify with. I've been going to a service on Sunday evenings called Resonate, and their small group on Wednesday nights, as well as Chi Alpha (the A/G campus ministry) on Tuesdays when I'm not swamped with homework, and their women's group called "Core" on Thursdays. So I'm busy almost every evening of the week if I want to be, with church. And it's fabulous. I went to lunch this afternoon with someone from Chi Alpha, and she put it really well - "With another Christian, you can be friends in less than a minute, because you're brothers and sisters. With a non-believer, it takes longer to find substance to make that deeper connection." So true! One of the things I LOVED about Cornerstone was that everyone there was as close to me as a sibling, and I loved them that much. I realize now that it can be like that with people I've just met, solely because we both share the same Father.
It's weird for me to be this open about faith stuff. I'm usually one of those people who thinks that if I live my life as a testimony, the opportunities to share will just appear. Now, I'm actually looking for those open doors on my own - watching for any chance to talk about God. It's something I'd always wished to be like, and never had to. It's freeing, and also scary, because I realize how hard it is to verbalize some of the things I've always just "understood" about Christianity. Or things I'd "assumed" about other religions. Once you have faces, friends, to put to those affiliations, it's so much easier to want to share with them, to want to be that missionary. And it's also a LOT harder to believe in stereotyping people.
No matter how much blech I've been in the last (wow, almost) four weeks, it's true that I AM having a good time. I know that once this awkward transition period is over, I'll really like college. This is where I was planted, and I'm ready to keep walking forward.
*Lyrics from "The Stand"
I guess this is just another unravelling entry, getting further into the explanation of my life as a college student. One thing I've really had to make a conscious effort to do here is to pursue faith. It's funny - it's never something I've had to really do, at least not to this magnitude. Faith has been literally brought to me. It's been my choice, obviously, to believe or not, and to what degree I actually live it. And I thought I was doing pretty well.
Coming here, I've learned a lot about how crucial the Christian community really is in my life. The first week of WSU none of the ministries were meeting. And I was drowning - in a giant pool of loneliness and self-pity. Although I was meeting people, it was obvious how far away we were from one another spiritually, and it just creates this bubble of total isolation. The first time I went to a campus group, I was literally more emotionally fragile than I think I've ever been. And EVERYthing made me cry. The person sitting next to me asked how I was, and I almost lost it. Because when you spend your entire life, your entire existence, taking Christian fellowship for granted, it's amazing how fast you dry up. I've learned what it means to be truly "thirsty" for God, and I've had to be bold about who I am.
It's like, the second that you meet someone now, you get an idea of where they stand. There's such an obvious difference between light and dark in people - something I wasn't used to noticing before. It's really true - Jesus shines THROUGH people.
I've been so excited to start finding people that I identify with. I've been going to a service on Sunday evenings called Resonate, and their small group on Wednesday nights, as well as Chi Alpha (the A/G campus ministry) on Tuesdays when I'm not swamped with homework, and their women's group called "Core" on Thursdays. So I'm busy almost every evening of the week if I want to be, with church. And it's fabulous. I went to lunch this afternoon with someone from Chi Alpha, and she put it really well - "With another Christian, you can be friends in less than a minute, because you're brothers and sisters. With a non-believer, it takes longer to find substance to make that deeper connection." So true! One of the things I LOVED about Cornerstone was that everyone there was as close to me as a sibling, and I loved them that much. I realize now that it can be like that with people I've just met, solely because we both share the same Father.
It's weird for me to be this open about faith stuff. I'm usually one of those people who thinks that if I live my life as a testimony, the opportunities to share will just appear. Now, I'm actually looking for those open doors on my own - watching for any chance to talk about God. It's something I'd always wished to be like, and never had to. It's freeing, and also scary, because I realize how hard it is to verbalize some of the things I've always just "understood" about Christianity. Or things I'd "assumed" about other religions. Once you have faces, friends, to put to those affiliations, it's so much easier to want to share with them, to want to be that missionary. And it's also a LOT harder to believe in stereotyping people.
No matter how much blech I've been in the last (wow, almost) four weeks, it's true that I AM having a good time. I know that once this awkward transition period is over, I'll really like college. This is where I was planted, and I'm ready to keep walking forward.
*Lyrics from "The Stand"
9.11.2010
"...God's got his hand on you, so don't live life in fear..."
Well, I've never tried this blog thing before. But one of the things I read in a "what to do in college" book somewhere was start a blog. And I guess in four years, it would be pretty cool to be able to look back and see what went on at every stage in this experience. Hopefully, I'll be good about it, and remember to post at least once every week or two. We'll see how long it lasts, but I'm gonna try. Plus, I'm always the kind of person who enjoys seeing my thoughts in print. It's a good way to process.
Anyhow, I'm officially a freshman in college! Tuesday marks my one month anniversary of being in Pullman. That's so crazy to say! I've never been away from home longer than a week until now. There's so much that's gone on that I can't wait to rant/blog about... although it's pretty late to get it all out now. Where to even begin!
I'll just start in the present, and then slowly make my way backward through the last few weeks as the opportunity arises. I had a great Friday today - after having a minor meltdown on Thursday, it was nice to get control of my roller-coaster emotions again. (That's another thing! I'm not an emotional person. I'm usually very controlled, level-headed, and rational about it. I don't like drama, I don't like blowing things out of proportion. But I've been such an emotional unpredictability lately, it's driving me up a wall.) Anyhow, today was good. I was productive, and yet still social. :) It was fun to have a low-key night with some ice cream, Gilmore Girls, and a new friend. Still weird, because I've never really been required to make friends - but I think I'm getting the hang of it okay. I do miss that community a lot though, of having people around who know you completely. It's hard to be stupid or random here, because you never know what someone's going to think, since they haven't grown up with you and know that really, deep down, you are sane. :D
Tomorrow is the first home football game. It's crazy how big of a deal people are making it! I guess that's partially due to the fact that it's college, and it's "Family Weekend", and it's one of the few games that WSU is predicted to win this year. Lol. But I mean, when the entire marching band is outside of one of the frat parties playing "Pharoah, Pharoah" at 11pm, you know people are gonna show up in spirit. There's actually rumor that they go around campus at 6am on football Saturdays - we'll see if that bodes true or not. But I'm goin' - in my WSU t-shirt and jeans! Heck yes!
What else is new as of today? Nothing that won't take an entire blog entry to explain, I don't think. I'll have to leave the update on my classes and everything for another day. It's gettin' a little late, and I still want to finish up a few more calculus problems before tomorrow so I won't have to think about them. So excited to sleep in!
Oh - and I'm going to title each entry in this blog with song lyrics, I've decided. (Hence the URL including "replay". Song title, and also, kind of what a blog is. A way to replay your life!) This entry is titled after "The Words I Would Say" by Sidewalk Prophets.
Until the next time, everyone! Looking forward to more of this journey!
Anyhow, I'm officially a freshman in college! Tuesday marks my one month anniversary of being in Pullman. That's so crazy to say! I've never been away from home longer than a week until now. There's so much that's gone on that I can't wait to rant/blog about... although it's pretty late to get it all out now. Where to even begin!
I'll just start in the present, and then slowly make my way backward through the last few weeks as the opportunity arises. I had a great Friday today - after having a minor meltdown on Thursday, it was nice to get control of my roller-coaster emotions again. (That's another thing! I'm not an emotional person. I'm usually very controlled, level-headed, and rational about it. I don't like drama, I don't like blowing things out of proportion. But I've been such an emotional unpredictability lately, it's driving me up a wall.) Anyhow, today was good. I was productive, and yet still social. :) It was fun to have a low-key night with some ice cream, Gilmore Girls, and a new friend. Still weird, because I've never really been required to make friends - but I think I'm getting the hang of it okay. I do miss that community a lot though, of having people around who know you completely. It's hard to be stupid or random here, because you never know what someone's going to think, since they haven't grown up with you and know that really, deep down, you are sane. :D
Tomorrow is the first home football game. It's crazy how big of a deal people are making it! I guess that's partially due to the fact that it's college, and it's "Family Weekend", and it's one of the few games that WSU is predicted to win this year. Lol. But I mean, when the entire marching band is outside of one of the frat parties playing "Pharoah, Pharoah" at 11pm, you know people are gonna show up in spirit. There's actually rumor that they go around campus at 6am on football Saturdays - we'll see if that bodes true or not. But I'm goin' - in my WSU t-shirt and jeans! Heck yes!
What else is new as of today? Nothing that won't take an entire blog entry to explain, I don't think. I'll have to leave the update on my classes and everything for another day. It's gettin' a little late, and I still want to finish up a few more calculus problems before tomorrow so I won't have to think about them. So excited to sleep in!
Oh - and I'm going to title each entry in this blog with song lyrics, I've decided. (Hence the URL including "replay". Song title, and also, kind of what a blog is. A way to replay your life!) This entry is titled after "The Words I Would Say" by Sidewalk Prophets.
Until the next time, everyone! Looking forward to more of this journey!
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